Relationship Wisdom Women Giving Up Their Power
Have you been in a relationship where you gave up your individuality or independence as a woman for the sake of the relationship? What is the price you are paying? What are you missing in your life?
HOW DOES IT HAPPEN?
In my clinical work with couples I have observed many relationship dynamics where the woman has, over time, given up some part of herself. In many cases it is due to the interaction and the power play between the partners. Women might not want to rock the boat and prefer to keep the peace and harmony and because they usually engage with a partner who is dominant (in this dynamic) they have learnt to give up part of their personal power, independence and individuality to achieve this.
WHAT IS THE LIKELY EFFECT?
Many women in my practice have become resentful and even though they want to keep the peace, the part in them that has been undervalued is craving to be lived. Depending on the kind of power play this can lead to volatile conversations where the men might up the ante to keep the dynamic going.
WHERE DOES THIS PATTERN ORIGINATE?
I've seen various different reasons why couples live with this pattern. It might be that they have had parents to model who lived exactly this pattern or they are victims of the cultural or societal heritage, where women are supposed to succumb and be subservient.
CHANGE IS HAPPENING
In today's society however women are coming into their power and are claiming it. Nowadays, in comparison to the last century, it is possible for a woman to live on her own and work and feed the children as a single mum. For many women however this perspective is far worse than staying in a relationship that is not satisfying.
If a relationship has the ability to allow for the power dynamic to shift, both partners ideally will be able to live with their individuality and their personal power. This means that the communication needs to be top quality and there needs to be willingness on both sides to find compromises. In an ideal world, masters of relationship are able to swap the decision making from situation to situation and are aware when the dynamic gets one sided. It also means taking absolute personal responsibility to deal with your own unresolved issues and not use them to project onto your partner.
Want to know more? Have a look at my blog.
NATHALIE HIMMELRICH is the founder of 'REACH FOR THE SKY THERAPY' on Sydney's Northern Beaches and specialises in 'relationship related issues'. She is working with individuals and couples using techniques ranging from Counselling, Neuro Linguistic Programming to Journey Therapy. She supports clients in their personal growth in a supportive and professional environment.
Visit my website: http://www.reachforthesky.com.au/ or visit my blog: http://reachforthesky.wordpress.com/ and sign up for our newsletter today.
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