Doc Love(Photos)

Doc Love - Success Coach
Can You Hypnotize Women Into Wanting You ?

for that one special person.

Dear Doc,

So I told her that special person might be
her. She told me it's not her. She then

I've been around the block and I know a lot

started cross examining me again, trying to
get more information about me. Anyway she

about women. But, Doc, you've helped me to
understand and handle things in a better

told me that she had to go and has a test on
Tuesday to study for, and I shouldn't call

way.

her again.

For example, when I'm pining for a woman who
I should blow-off because she has low

So Doc, what do I do now?

Interest Level in me, I listen to your CD's
and gather the strength to do what is right.

Your philosophy helps me to clear my mind of
the "wrong" ladies, making room for the

Hi Ter,

"right" ladies when they appear. I believe
the biggest mistake men make in the mating

Did you know that you're a Feminsta's fantasy
come true? Guys like you give the male

game is being unable to let go of the "wrong"
ladies.

bashers more ammo to use to justify their
"all men are creeps" propaganda. Plus, you're

And, this brings me to my question. IS IT

part of the reason that there's a "War of the
Sexes" in America today.

Ever possible to raise a woman'S interest
Level from less than neutral to high levels?

You'd better wake up Dude. What you're doing

Various "Don Juan" columnists and advisors
suggest that it is possible by using

with this girl is dangerous. And the saddest
thing about your question is that you don't

sophisticated hypnotic seduction techniques.
You've heard it all, I'm certain.

have a clue that you're doing anything
wrong.

Moreover, I recently read a social studies

I teach men to be a Challenge and to be

book about the art of seduction that also
suggests that this is possible. The author

positively mysterious, but not creepily
mysterious like you're being in this

states that only apathy is not seducible,
but, with the proviso that you initially pick

situation. Haven't you ever seen a film where
the woman is being stalked by an obsessive

the right "target" to seduce.

guy who doesn't have the self-confidence to
approach her properly? You're that guy,

What are your thoughts on this? And, if you
do think it's possible to raise a near-dead

Terry.

Interest Level (even if only remotely so),
what techniques would you employ? I'd love to

A surprise call from a complete stranger is
guaranteed to attack a woman's comfort level,

hear from you.

make her feel quite concerned and possibly
frightened. So, you should never, ever call

any woman for a date when she hasn't directly
given you her phone number herself. Are you

Hey Georgio,

getting the drift Terry?

We all know what it's like.

You said that you saw her on campus. So why
didn't you just walk up to her and say

There you are, for instance, at a
charity-fundraiser cocktail party. Your

something like: "Hi. My intuition tells me
that you're a Psychology major. Am I right?"

friend has just introduced you to a woman
that he's been telling you about, one of the

Something positive and non-threatening, like
a normal guy might do. Then you might have

most attractive women in attendance. She's
young, beautiful, sophisticated, and your

had a shot at getting her number and actually
getting her out on a date. But your courtship

friend has already informed you that she's
also single and tends to go for the same

technique is straight out of the Troubled
Loser's Handbook.

physical type as you.

But the girl you've been harassing is not

As you stand there, looking into her eyes,
trying to get an interesting conversation

without blame in this situation either. She
must be some kind of Bimbo because any

going with her, you think to yourself, "Wow,
this girl is way cool! She seems like she

could be real long-term relationship
material. Hmmmm." You start to get a rush of

encouraged you by engaging you in further
conversation. I think that she's just too

excitement as you fantasize about the
possibilities with her. You figure that

stupid to realize that she was being
terrorized by you. Lucky for you she doesn't

you've got a real good chance here.

have more brains or else you might have wound
up having a little visit from the Sheriff.

But as another couple of minutes go by, you
begin to notice that she doesn't really seem

Terry, you need to build your social skills

to be very interested in what you're sharing
with her. Even though you're being your usual

so you feel comfortable and confident meeting
women face to face. Perhaps a bit of

charming self, she's just not warming up to
you. In fact, now she's not even looking at

counseling and a self esteem seminar or two
would get you going in the right direction.

you while you're talking to her. You're ready
to propose, and she's finds you about as

In the meantime, stay off the telephone. If
you don't, you may soon find yourself being

interesting as a Congressional hearing on
farm subsidies.

handcuffed and taken to a confined space with
a new 300 pound roommate named Bubba.

The next thing you know, she says, "Nice

meeting you," as she walks off without saying
another word. Ten minutes later you see her

comfort level.

laughing with and touching the arm of some
other guy that apparently she's also just

Women Understand Men And Men Don't Understand
Women

met. But for him, it seems that she's
suddenly somehow grown a personality.

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success

Now, wouldn't it be fantastic if there were a

Coach - Doc Love

secret super-seduction-technique you could
use in a situation like this, some hypnotic

word pattern you could employ, to enchant any
woman and raise her Interest Level in you? If

As a single, attractive dating female, I've
been reading your articles, and I protest.

a such a method existed, however devious, to
control a woman's mind and make her like you,

There are so many wonderful, beautiful and

wouldn't you love to know what it was?

kind souled single women in San Diego County
who would love to meet a great guy to date

And, indeed, this is the very kind of thing
that some dating coaches claim that they can

and have a real relationship with. But you
are misleading men by telling them to play

teach you in a matter of days or weeks.
Methods for creating not only instant rapport

'hard to get' and you're only contributing to
more animosity and misunderstanding between

with a disinterested woman, but also
techniques to make her start to have romantic

men and women. The last thing we need around
here is more men who play games.

feelings for you within minutes.

I took your article: "Wait-a-Week-to-Call" to

Can it be done? The simple answer is yes.
Using a clever combination of Ericsonian

my women's support group and they all just
laughed! "What is he trying to do, teach men

Hypnosis and Neuro-Linguistic Programming
techniques, it IS possible to make a

to be conniving women? That's what our
mothers told US to do!"

disinterested woman deeply interested in you,
but the level of mastery required to

Teaching men to use a "strategy" takes all of

successfully capture the heart of a woman who
has less than 50% Interest Level in you is

the real excitement out of dating and meeting
someone of real substance. If you told a man

extraordinary.

from back East to use manipulative strategies
as you recommend, he'd laugh in your face.

If you had no background in this field and
you had to start from square one (which is

the case for most guys), it would be about
the same as being a non-musician and having

who take your advice must be real losers
anyway!

to learn how to play the piano near the level
of an orchestral virtuoso.

If I met a man I was attracted to at a party

The promise of being able to quickly teach a

and he took my number and didn't call me for
a week, I'd think he was going through his

guy to have the mastery required to pull off
this kind of maneuver, is in itself very

list and I happened to be the booby prize
because no one else wanted him.

seductive. But when you take a scientific
poll of the guys who have spent money on the

A real man would call the next day and at

tapes and manuals to learn thes

least show he was interested as soon as
possible. Then he could make the date for

Also be aware that all these 'win quick'
coaches tell you that you have to pre-qualify

next week or whenever. But at least he was
manly enough to be Tarzan to my Jane. If he

your "target" and that their methods don't
work with some women because those women just

wants to be Jane, then I wouldn't want him
anyway!

aren't intelligent enough. That's their 'out'
clause. What they're really saying is that

If you guys just want to chase the same big

she has to have an Interest Level of at least
65% in order for you to get a significant

boobed So. Cal. beauties, then of course,
stand in line for a letdown no matter when

positive response right away.

you call. If you really want a kindred spirit
to love and be with, then forget the

The good thing about these techniques is that
they place tremendous importance on making

contrived strategies and step up to the
plate!

your love interest feel happy, positive
feelings and on getting her to associate

We need some REAL men around here.

those feelings with being with you. They
encourage you to make her laugh if you can,

LeeAnn - who says: "Print this if you dare!"
Dear LeeAnn,

and to get her to feel super comfortable.
They also teach you the importance of

Is that the best you can come up with? I see

emanating an aura of confidence. Of course,
all of that is totally in alignment with what

by the way you communicate why you wind up at
the bottom of the list.

"The System" says.

I have to thank you, LeeAnn, because you have

But there's also a downside to these
seduction techniques. Even if you are able to

provided us with yet another great example of
why you can't find out what women want by

raise a woman's Interest Level from the dead,
however sincere you are, there's a tremendous

asking them. If you and your girlfriends were
able to be truly objective about your inner

amount of manipulation involved. If you can
live with that, fine. But I'd rather have the

needs and desires, you wouldn't be trying to
make a mockery of my "wait a week to call"

woman choose me first. Why? Because it feels
much better and it's a whole hell of a lot

strategy.

less work.

LeeAnn, imagine that you had gone to a
cocktail party where you had met a

As my acupuncturist, Dr. Lao, would say,
"Better to let kitty cat come to you,

successful, handsome gentleman who was a dead
ringer for Pierce Brosnan. The two of you

Grasshopper, than chase her around yard with
bowl of milk."

made a nice connection and he asked you for
your phone number.

Remember, guys: men do the picking, but women

Then you found yourself thinking about him,

do the choosing.

hoping that he would call to ask you out.
Would you blow him off when he called you

seven days later? Or would you be delighted
that he finally called, and be eager to see

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success
Coach - Doc Love

him? Would you say to him: "I'm sorry guy,
you waited more than 24 hr. to call me and

that means that you aren't a real man so no
thank you." Give me a break!

I just read that 47,000 women answered People

The truth is that you'd be saying, "Yes, I'd

love to go out with you" faster than Rosie
O'Donnell can gobble up a cream tart. And why

the most important attribute for a man to
have is a sense of humor, according to 43%.

would you be saying yes so readily and
enthusiastically? Because you had, what I

31% value sensitivity first. 19% say
intelligence. 6% rank good looks first, and

call, High Interest in your James Bond look
alike. Your Interest Level in him was 79% or

just 2% say money is most important.

so from the get go. But when he waited a week
to call you, your Interest Level moved even

Once the guy gets her phone number, 47% of
women expect him to call within 24 hours, and

higher into the low 80's.

47% will wait up to three days. Only about 5%
are still willing to hear from him after a

You see, LeeAnn, in my hypothetical scenario,
you already liked him a lot, but when he took

week.

his time to call you, you perceived him as an
even more intriguing guy who has a full life

I'm curious on your take, Doc. What do you
think? Which is the truth and which is the

and isn't desperately hoping to find some
woman to make him happy. Someone who is a

brainwashing?

REAL -- "real man."

Gordon - who wants to know if women are
capable of communicating what they actually

Yes LeeAnn, you'd see him as a Challenge. And
whether you know it or not, that's what you

want

respond to on an emotional level - a guy who
is a Challenge. Not some needy, eager to

Hi Gordon,

please, politically correct nincompoop who is
seeking your approval by calling you the next

Brainwashing, yep, you can say that again. As
usual, the politically correct

day.

Feminista-dominated media have come up with a
bunch of half-truths when it comes to

If I had an opportunity to use my
interviewing techniques on you, I'm certain

understanding women. Why? To confuse you guys
even more that you are.

that I'd discover that the last guy you fell
in love with was, in some fundamental way, a

Remember that trying to find out what women

Challenge. Hopefully it wasn't a married man
who saw you only twice a month.

want by asking them is like trying to get
Gary Condit to tell you how he honestly feels

You and your girlfriends say that I'm

about marriage and commitment. You'll get an
answer, but it won't have much to do with

teaching men to be conniving women. Well, I
couldn't have said it better my self. If

reality.

fathers would teach their sons to be a little
more conniving, then the war of the sexes

I have interviewed thousands of women and not
one ever said to me:

might be a bit more of a fair fight instead
of manslaughter.

1. I want a man whom I can't control.

But your mothers were wasting their time

2. I want a man who, when I test him, does
not give in.

teaching you to be conniving. As a woman,
it's already built into you. Women have an

3. I want a man who keeps me guessing.

innate understanding of men, but men don't
understand women at all. Or as Jack Nicholson

But you will see many women in long
term-committed relationships with guys who

once said: " Women, they're smarter than us,
they're stronger than us, and they don't play

fair." But when my guys use "The System",
they're finally able to out-game and out-gun

OK Gordon, now let's go over this list so I
can un-brainwash you and the rest of

you gals.

mankind.

And you think that my strategies are
manipulative? I'll tell you LeeAnn. If any of

Yes, most women do prefer a guy with a sense
of humor. When a guy is able to consistently

my guys has the self-sabotaging habit of
calling a potential date 24 hrs. after

make a woman laugh, it shows her that he is
confident and also fun to be with. And as we

getting her number, then I have to break him
of that habit. He needs to learn to use a

all know, girls just want to have fun. But
the idea that a sense of humor is the number

success strategy rather than a failure
strategy, so I give him rules and principles

one attribute that women look for in a man is
a bunch of malarkey.

to follow. Call it manipulative if you like,
but you do yourself and all men a great

In order for a woman to even give a hoot

disservice by disparaging my advice.

whether you have a sense of humor she first
has to find you physically attractive. If

I'll agree with you on one thing. My
philosophy is passive/aggressive but only in

she's not physically attracted to you, you
can be more hilarious than Robin Williams on

a positive sense. I show men that there is a
time to be aggressive and there is a time to

speed and you still won't have a chance for
romance with her. The Reality Factor says

be passive. A man takes aggressive action by,
for instance, being sure to always ask a

that you have to pass (her) Physical
Attraction Test first in order to get to

woman whom he's interested in for her phone
number. Then he's passive when he waits a

first base.

week to call her, and then he's aggressive
again when he calls her for the date. But he

If a sense of humor were really the trait
that women found most important in men, then

doesn't rush in like a dog in heat.

all the funny guys who look like Danny De
Vito would be as successful with women as all

And LeeAnn, why are you so resentful towards
your skinny sisters who have large breasts,

the handsome hunks.

long legs, thick lips and high cheekbones?
I'm sure that many of them are nice people

It's fascinating to observe how reluctant
women are to admit how important looks are to

who deserve love just as much as you do.
Taking a kinder and gentler attitude towards

them - as evidenced by these poll results.
You don't necessarily have be the hunk from

all humankind might serve you well.

heaven, but in order to click with a
particular chick, you need to have a look

Remember, guys, women are dying to chase you,
they just don't realize it.

that she likes or you ain't gonna get the
love boat out of the dock no matter how hard

Why Is She All Warm And Fuzzy And Then Cold

you paddle.

As Ice ?

The poll results revealed that 31% of women
say they value "sensitivity" foremost. Now

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success
Coach - Doc Love

there's a loaded word if I ever heard one.
What do they mean by "sensitivity?" They

Help me Doc,

don't explain it, do they? What a woman
usually means when she says she wants a

Lately I have been having trouble with a girl

"sensitive" guy, is that she wants a guy who
will share all of his emotional pain, will

I really care about. At first we were just
friends and I was fine with it. As time

dutifully listen to her complaints about
everything and will happily take orders from

passed though, I grew attached to her and
started really feeling for her. When I

her. Of course this type of guy is always
getting rejected or he is kept around as a

finally got up the courage to tell her this,
her only reply was that she cared for me but

dartboard for all of her zingers. You see,
Gordon, more female propaganda.

"not in that way." I was hurt. I told her
that I was still her friend but never really

So almost half of the women who responded to

talked to her much after that, went off to
college but could not completely let go.

the poll expect a guy to call within 24
hours? Yeah, they EXPECT a guy to call within

Well, while off at UCLA I discovered your

24 hours because 90% of men can barely wait
even that long before they call.

articles on askmen.com rather by accident and
started learning about how to treat women and

Unfortunately, thousands of guys are going to
read those poll results and will feel even

how you have to be a Challenge and seem less
interested in her than she is in you.

more justified in jumping the gun as they
always do.

When I moved back home we started talking

And according to the poll, only 5% of women

again but I tried out my newly learned
Challenge techniques on her. I did a lot of

are willing to hear from a guy after a week.
FALSE! It would have been much more helpful

acting kind of aloof, slightly ignoring her
and only calling her once a week instead of

and revealing if the People pollsters had
asked those women a question like: Have you

everyday like I used to.

ever had a relationship with a guy who waited
a week or longer to call you? If so, why did

As time passed by she started being genuinely
nicer to me; she started calling me more.

you date him even though he waited that long?
Then we would have gotten some valuable

Then one day when we were swimming together
and things seemed to change. She was more

information.

flirtatious than usual and we eventually
walked to a demolished small house where we

19% (1 in 5) want intellegence. Does this
mean that 4 out of 5 women are looking for

found a tree to have a cigarette in.

stupid life long partners?

The branches were just high enough that she
had to give me a boost up (she placed her

hands directly on my rear to do this too).
Then I lifted her up. The rest of that day we

of women are gold diggers. How does that jive
with your experience? How many women have

talked and her attitude changed, the body
language she gave was positive and for

asked you, "What do you do?"

brevity's sake I'll just say it went well.

Remember; don't get brainwashed by the
poll-takers questions and women's answers.

She called me the next day, but I didn't
answer the phone in an attempt to be a

Can't She Stop Talking About Her

Challenge and called her a couple days later.
After that she was even nicer to me, always

Ex-Boyfriends ?

asking how I was, wondering if I was OK. Then
I went to Newport Beach on vacation for a

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success
Coach - Doc Love

week and when I came back I ran into her with
friends, and she said she had missed me so

Hi Doc,

much and gave me a big wet kiss in front of
everyone.

I have the greatest girl in the world.

The next day I went to her work to visit her

Caprice and I have been dating for over 18
months. She's a giver, she's flexible and

and plan something for the following day
because she was off. But that day she seemed

she's honest as a nun. We are constantly
having fun, and the conversation never dries

distant and it felt odd, so I left quickly
and waited till yesterday when she called me

up. Our families are close, and everyone
assumes that we will get married.

and we got together.

But as you say in your dating dictionary,

Let's say it didn't seem to go well. We
didn't talk much. She avoided my occasional

"There are no clean deals." And I'm hoping
that you can shed some light on my

flirtation and avoided eye contact when we
ate. When we got to her house she got out of

situation.

the car quickly and barely said bye.

The problem is that Caprice keeps talking
about her old boyfriends. I know you probably

What's going on with her? Was I too cold? Did
I suddenly move too fast and scare her? Did I

think that she's rubbing them in my face, but
she actually isn't. She feels that honesty

just read into everything too much and set
myself up again for complete heartache? I

means openness about everything. She
inadvertently brags about what great things

don't plan on talking to her for a week or
so. What do I do now? How should I make my

these guys have done, and I could care less.

move, or did I screw things up too badly?

I've tried ignoring it when she starts
rhapsodising about these guys. It's mainly

two different ones and ignoring it doesn't
seem to discourage her. And to be real

Geoff - who is confused Hi Geoff,

honest, it's starting to get on my nerves.

Great goin'! Once you learned about the power
of Challenge you immediately changed your

I'd like to tell her that it bothers me and
ask her to stop. But I'm afraid that if I

sappy ways. That's not an easy thing for a
lot of guys to do but you did it.

tell her that it bothers me, then she'll
think I'm insecure and she won't see me as a

In answer to your questions, I don't think

Challenge. I know how important you say it is
to always be a Challenge. So how should I

that you were "too cold." It sounds as if you
did a good job of being just cool enough. It

handle this Doc?

also appears that you didn't move too fast.
You let her come at you and that's right on.

Tom - who doesn't want to hear about her old
boyfriends

Now, if you had been able to apply the

Hi Tom,

principles of "The System" to this situation
when you and this girl had first met, we

Women often complain that their dates or

would now have an easier time deciphering
what her true motivations are. But since you

boyfriends talk too much about their former
girlfriends, but many women are equally

started being a Challenge only after she had
initially rejected you, the situation is a

guilty of the same indiscretion. (Women also
hate it when men look at other women.) A

bit more confusing than it might otherwise
be.

considerable number of gals seem to think
that being honest means being open about

But acting like detectives on "Law and

Order", we will examine the four possible
explanations for her confusing behavior:

differently.

One, you used Challenge very effectively and

You can be honest without being open, and
it's better not to be "open" about your

turned her around. But when she showed real
romantic interest in you, you got too excited

former lovers. Whether you're a man or a
woman sharing with your current partner all

and went back to your old non-Challenging
ways. Once you did that you brought her

kinds of details about your past
relationships is the opposite of romantic,

Interest Level back down South where it
started, and there will be no third chance

and it's also unloving. It serves no positive
purpose. And most important, it's

for you. Accuracy probability rating for this
explanation: 8%.

disrespectful to the other person.

Two, you've been a Challenge all along (since

your awakening) and now she's just testing
you to see if you lose it and go back to your

to "get it" that her behavior is starting to
jeopardize your relationship. So here's what

old ways and start coming on heavy again.
(But if that's the case, you've got a gal

I recommend:

who's so insecure that she has to keep having
her partner jump through hoops, which

First, use humor to give her the big hint
that what she's doing ain't Kosher. For

disqualifies her as a potential girlfriend.)
Accuracy probability rating for this

instance, when she starts going on and on
about what a fantastic singer her ex, Jimmy,

explanation: 5%.

is, you say: "Oh yeah? That's interesting. My
ex, Cassandra, used to be a backup singer for

Three, after she rejected you in the
beginning her Interest Level stayed in the

Sting until she couldn't deal with his ego
anymore. But you should hear her voice, she

basement and never moved up at all. But when
you became a Challenge, you ruffled her ego.

makes Christina Aguilera sound like Phyliss
Diller. I think Cassandra is such a great

She didn't like that you had stopped
groveling and didn't enjoy losing control

singer because she has an amazing lung
capacity." And then wink at your girlfriend

over you. So she flirted with you and seduced
you into thinking that she had grown romantic

like Dennis Quaid would, and walk out of the
room. Let her wonder whether you were for

feelings for you.

real or not.

Then when she knew that she had you back
under her spell, she acted disinterested

Try the humor strategy up to five times (each
time you would use a different silly story)

again so she could have the pleasure of
confusing you and hurting you. Thus she was

and then if she still doesn't see the light,
you can try simply telling her that her

able to put you back in your place and
demonstrate to you that you shouldn't try to

behavior bothers you and that you'd like her
to stop. By doing this, you are still being a

beat her at her own game.

Challenge because you are saying "no,"
setting limits, and insisting that she be

Although I may sound quite cynical here, the
truth is that some women do this sort of

respectful. You can tell her twice to cool it
if you have to, but don't do it a third time

thing and get away with it! Still, I really
don't think that your girl fits this

because that would make you a nag.

description. She seems to be more of an
innocent type. But as a love detective I have

Hopefully she'll get the drift by this point.
If she still continues with her unloving

to look at all the possibilities. So,
accuracy probability rating for this

behavior, we would then move to the hardball,
ultimatum stage. (As a general rule, I do not

explanation: 2%.

recommend using ultimatums. However,
sometimes they are necessary when all else

And four, she never really had any romantic
feelings for you, but when you came back from

fails and your partner is not responding to
more gentle proddings. You have to know if

college, you got her at a time when she was
bored and lonely. She had nothing else going

she'll get in line BEFORE you say "I do".)

on, so she flirted with you and made out with
you, but she kept her heart to herself.

So here's what you can do as a last resort:
As soon as she starts in again with the

Remember, a woman with low Interest level (in
the 40-49% range) can still do all kinds of

anecdotes about her former lovers, look at
your watch and say "oops, I just remembered I

have an appointment" (even if it's ten at
night) and then leave abruptly. Don't call

Now she's got something else going on with
someone she has real interest in, but she's

her for a week. If she calls you, let her
talk to your answering service.

reluctant to tell you to your face. This
explanation is the one that I would bet on.

If she doesn't wake up after all that, Tom,

Accuracy probability rating: 85%.

then her head is made of concrete.

But Geoff, regardless of the reason why this
girl is now acting, as she is, The Reality

Remember, guys, if she wants to keep you,
she's can't disrespect you - and get away

Factor says that she's skittish and
inconsistent. And consistency is a crucial

with it.

quality for any potential girlfriend to
have.

So on a higher level of awareness; we don't

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success
Coach - Doc Love

look for an explanation for her behavior. We
simply look at reality and note that at this

Hi Doc,

point, this girl has become a hassle. She's
not available to be in relationship (at least

not with you Geoff). Plus, she's making you
work too hard. Remember, when women like you,

I found you I had been taking the advice of
several other love doctors, almost all of

they help you, and she's giving you about as
much help as an IRS administrator.

them female. (It seems that most of the
relationship "experts" in the general media,

are women.) And I've got to tell you that I
was given a lot of bogus information. Now

one day and then cold and distant the next.
And when you asked, you would get an answer

that I understand your "System," I realize
that many of these so-called "experts" were

which might range from something like "What
do you mean? I wasn't cold and distant." to

totally wrong about all kinds of things. It's
actually painful to see how much time I've

"I don't know, I'm just not sure," to "Well,
I'm depressed about environmental pollution,"

wasted following their advice.

or some other form of Womanese.

In the interest of helping my brothers out
there who are trying to understand women, I

The answer she gave might or might not have
something to do with the truth (she might not

even know herself well enough to give an
accurate answer). But whatever her answer,

the wrong track. (I guess it's probably
better to not mention her real name - maybe

we can just call her Dr. Lu Lu) Maybe you
would like to publish this and then point out

So at this point, Geoff, I'd say it's time to

the misconceptions that she's selling. I
think I know what's wrong with her logic but

move on to greener pastures because this gal
is going to continue to be more of a pain in

I may have missed something. Check it out:

the butt than six hours on a circus bench.
Just look at this whole episode as a learning

Things a Man Should Do to Get a Second Date
By Dr. Lu Lu Ph.D.

adventure so you don't waste so much time
next time around.

1. If you are nervous, don't try to hide it.

Remember, guys, every girl is practice for

Women adore men who are aware of their own
emotions and who are not afraid to share

the next.

them. A simple, "I have to admit that I feel
a little nervous tonight" is endearing. Also,

Eliminate Your Competition By Being A
Challenge

once you acknowledge your own anxiety, it
tends to lessen.

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success

2. Give her a genuine compliment, but make

Coach - Doc Love

sure that it cannot be interpreted in a
sexual way. It is risky to tell a woman on a

Hello Doc,

first date that she has sexy lips. It's far
better to tell her that she has a pretty

I just read your most recent article in
www.askmen.com

face. A man who cannot keep his sexual
desires under wraps on a first date may turn

In my experience I have lost some great women

off many women.

because I didn't call them right away or
enough. As the girl in your last article

3. Touch her heart. Bring her a small gift if
you can think of something cute, clever or

said, when a guy calls her after a week she
does not feel special any more. Women have

profoundly simple (e.g., a toy for her dog or
a few flowers).

walked away from me because of that very
reason. You cannot argue with real life

So, go ahead and rip into her for me will ya

experience.

Doc? Thanks.

Women do want a Challenge but not in the form
of a lack of attention. They want it in the

Rufus - who wants to help spread your
wisdom.

form of not being able to control the man and
have their way with him. I believe the man

Hi Rufus,

still needs to be attentive right off the bat
but his attention must be strictly on his

Thanks, guy. You've given us a fantastic

terms and not on her terms. This means going
where he wants to and doing what he wants and

example of some of the horribly dangerous
information that's out there.

not giving into her requests and whims or
trying to make her feel good so that she will

Let's take apart these "tips" that you sent

like him.

me, one at a time.

By making the distinction that his attention,
affection and complements are something that

First of all, if you are out on a date and
you find yourself feeling nervous, you should

he gives on his own terms, the woman can see
that she has not yet won him over and is not

certainly acknowledge it (inwardly) and you
should keep your mouth shut about it. Deal

able to control him so, he remains a
Challenge and raises her Interest Level.

with it, but don't tell your date that you
feel nervous. Just that one simple confession

Acting this way has resulted in me having the

could put the kibosh on any potential
romance.

biggest successes with women. Plenty of
attention right away, but on my terms, based

The first date is like a job interview where

on what I want without letting the woman
control me. Waiting to call is a mistake.

you must come off as cool and confident. Many
of us are nervous on a first date, women

included. But why bring it up? It's a
negative, and by disclosing it you're putting

Hey Cary,

yourself down. It may lessen your anxiety to
get it off your chest but doing so will lower

You say that I teach Challenge via "lack of

attention." Well you obviously haven't
studied "The System" thoroughly. I coach men

with you.

to look at women's eyes whenever they're
talking and to be a great listener. And when

Next, let's look at compliments. One
compliment per date is OK. That's it. And it

they combine those qualities with patience
and proper timing, they start to become

certainly should not have any sexual
connotations whatsoever. But I absolutely do

winners in the dating game instead of
losers.

not recommend telling a hot looking woman
that she has a pretty face. You gain nothing

But even though you're off the track on

by it. It does not raise her romantic
Interest Level in you. She's hears that same

proper dating /telephone etiquette, your
insights about the importance of not seeking

compliment about fifteen times a day -every
day - and when you tell her that she's

approval from women are right on the money.
Although, what you're talking about has more

pretty, you automatically get added to the
list of salivating suitors who have said the

to do with respect than Challenge.

same thing to her over and over again. Your
job is to make her think you are different.

Now if you can set your ego aside and allow
me to educate you further about the

Who ever said it is the man's responsibility

importance of my "wait a week to call"
strategy, you'll soon be on your way to even

to be the one who gives the compliments. Do
female love doctors ever encourage women to

more success with women.

give a man a compliment on the first date?

First of all, let me ask you, how exactly do
you know for certain that these women who

Let's go to the last "tip" about gifts. Here
Dr. Lu Lu isn't pedaling any half-truths. Her

rejected you did so because you didn't call
soon enough or often enough? Remember, when

advice on this subject is totally, miserably
deluded. As my Uncle Jethro Love says: "If

you ask a woman why she rejected a particular
guy, 99 times out of 100, the first answer

you're going to bring a girl a gift on the
first date, you might as well just write the

you get will not be the real reason.

word "CHUMP" on your forehead."

I can hear you interviewing them now. "Hi
Caprice, I was calling you to find out the

reasons or reasons that you dropped me?
Sure," says Caprice. "When you got my number

desperately trying to make a good impression.
Gifts can come after sixty days once a

you waited a week to call and then you didn't
call me everyday to reassure me that you

relationship has been established. But gifts
should never be used as a ploy to raise

liked me, that's the reason."

Interest Level. Besides, any gift coming from
you has no meaning to her since you are

The real answer is always the second (or
third) answer that you pry out of a woman.

basically a stranger.

The first answer is always the politically
correct answer. And if the guy she rejected

Remember, guys, beware of false love
doctors.

and the guy who is interviewing her are one
in the same, it's 100% guaranteed that she

Why Is He Terrorizing Her ?

won't give a straight answer. I cross-examine
women when I survey, just like the cops on

Women Don't Lie - Men Don't Listen Success

"Law and Order." I doubt that you did this.

Coach - Doc Love

And how many women did you interview, four?
I've interviewed thousands and I have never

Hi Doc,

heard a woman say, "I dropped him because he
didn't give me enough phone calls." To you

I've been watching this beautiful girl on
campus. I phoned her two weeks ago, not using

Psych majors, do you really want someone as a
life-long partner who needs reassurance

my real name. I told that I was from another
campus and that I happened to see her when I

through Ma Bell every hour?

visited her campus. The first thing she
wanted to know is how I had got her phone

In actuality Cary, you should be happy that
women with low self-esteem are dropping you.

number, so I told that one of my friends took
it off someone's phone. Anyway, she wanted to

Having to constantly reassure your partner is
like riding on a stationery bicycle with a

know what I wanted, so I told her that I
wanted to get to know her.

metal seat, it's a pain in the butt and it
never really gets you anywhere.

She asked me why would I want to get to know

Cary, there's something you must understand.

her. I told her that I liked what I saw on
the outside and I wanted to see if the inside

A girl could give both you and another guy
her number on the same day. And that other

does the outside justice. She gave me a
giggle. She then said that I shouldn't call

guy might call her the next day and take her
out on a date while you're still waiting to

her again. I told that if she gave me a good
reason why I shouldn't call, that I wouldn't

first call her. But if she has higher
interest in you, she'll be thinking about you

call her again.

while she's out with him.

Then she tells me that she doesn't know me. I
told her I could change that. Then she tells

And when you finally call her after that
other guy has already called her for a second

me that wouldn't change anything. She's just
not interested. Then I told her that she was

date, you are raising her Interest Level even
higher. (She can't figure out why you aren't

jumping to conclusions. All I want is to get
to know her, be her friend and see what

being predictable like all the other guys
she's gotten rid of and she becomes more

happens from there.

intrigued.)

Then she asks me where I was from and what I
was studying. I asked her where she was from

So Cary, you don't have to worry about some
other dude beating you out while you're

and what she was studying and it was going
pretty well. I asked whether I could call her

biding your time using Challenge to your
advantage. Women do the choosing, and if she

again, she tells me no. So anyway I told her
that I would call her in two weeks time. She

chooses you, there ain't nothin' your
competition can do about it. And when you

didn't say yes or no.

wait to call, any chance your competition
might have had is seriously compromised.

I phoned her tonight and we started all over
again. I asked if she remembered who I was.

Don't be concerned about making her feel

She said no, so I refreshed her memory. She
then tells me that I shouldn't call her

special, make yourself special to her by
being a Challenge.

again. She told me that she has no interest
in guys because her studies were her first